Life

Sorry hubby, you aren’t lucky…

So the other day hubby came home from work and was telling me a story. A man he was having a conversation with had commented at some point that he was lucky because he had a wife who stayed at home, looked after the kids and cooked, cleaned and ironed for him.

Lucky, compared to my husband it seems…who irons his own shirts, helps me clean the house at weekends and picks little man up from nursery occasionally if I have to work late.

Lucky, compared to my husband because I choose to work full time, have a career and be a mum, whereas his wife doesn’t need or want to work and is happy to stay at home.

in the car

What an infuriating comment to say, and how disrespectful to me, the full time working wife and mother.

I have come up against this a lot recently with having to justify my reasons for working full time. 

Obviously, I know some mums would love to work, some have to work, and others don’t want to work. Everyone is different and I totally appreciate this fact. Please don’t think I don’t.

But until you know other peoples circumstances, I don’t think a comment can be made, especially a comment to suggest that my husband isn’t lucky.

I feel guilt every day when I go out for lunch and see parents with their children walking down the street. I question myself every day as to whether I have done the right thing.

I even think about going down to 4 days a week, just to stop that little nagging feeling in the pit of my tummy – that guilt that is always there.

But then I have nothing to feel guilty about. Everyone’s  family unit is lucky, just in their own unique way.

So, sorry hubby, unfortunately you are not lucky because I won’t iron your work shirts for you, and you have to push the hoover around upstairs on a Sunday afternoon!

Love the dreaded full time working mother and wife

aka

Busy Working Mummy XOXO

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9 thoughts on “Sorry hubby, you aren’t lucky…

  1. Great post…but so sad it had to be due an awful comment!
    I am a working mummy and there is nothing wrong with that. And do not feel guilty, the time you share with your family is the best and what a great work ethic our children will have 😊

    Liked by 1 person

  2. There is absolutely nothing wrong with what you are doing. I only work part time but it is what suited us, not anyone else. My hubby does jobs around the house because he likes to help, I am the lucky one
    #fortheloveofBLOG

    Liked by 1 person

  3. And yet we’re lucky there are women you prefer to be doctors, surgeons, lawyers (should we unfortunately need one), architects, policewomen, emergency service women, and work in shops, restaurants or whatever, Every time we stay at home mums need a good or service, and can get it with understanding, then aren’t we lucky not everyone decided they wanted to stay at home? And if we stay at home, how do we point out role models to our children? How do we say ‘YOu can have a family and a career?’ Tell your husband your child is lucky to see that women are more than just a housekeeper and parent and can fulfil their dreams and desires, and/or make money to provide for their family. Point out to your husband that the lucky guy has to earn enough to support an extra dependent and it’s cheaper to pay for your shirts to get ironed at a laundry mat than to lose a whole income. (I am a stay at home mum, but I also know all the ‘benefits’ of the housewife were invented in the 50’s to keep women out of the jobs so the returning soldiers could find work.)

    Like

    1. I’ve worked full time, part time and stayed home in the lives of my 3 kids. Working full time is the hardest on the mum because the dad doesn’t really pick up the slack & you have unnecessary guilt. So know that. #FortheloveofBlog

      Liked by 1 person

  4. What an idiot guy. That comment was offensive to working mothers through to SAHMs, including his own wife. Saying he’s lucky paints her as some kind of servant! I think every family is different and comments like that help nobody. You have no reason to feel guilty for working anymore than a SAHM needs to feel guilty for not returning to the paid workforce. You are all adding value and doing the best for your kids. That’s what’s important. Plus it’s embarrassing these days if a bloke doesn’t do any housework! #fortheloveofBLOG

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Every family does what works for them. Rev T stayed at home with the Tubblet when she was little. We did think we were “lucky”. But only because we were fortunate enough that my job paid enough for that to be an option. It isn’t for everyone. (I’d be giving him lucky in relation to doing the chores. Grrr. Being at work doesn’t excuse you from pitching in).

    Liked by 1 person

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