Now anyone that knows me knows that I am a huge routine person. I have been known to throw a few tantrums myself if things haven’t quite gone to plan or have changed last minute.
This is mainly due to my anxiety but also just due to who I am. I don’t apologise for it. Neither do I massively try to hide it.
Over the past few months, I have started to go with the flow and do what makes me happy.
When little man was a baby, I had his routine planned to within a few minutes. If he woke up at 6.30am, he would sleep, play and then be back asleep again within a 3 hour window for another hour and a half – I would know what the time was by the signs he was showing through the day.
We lived in 3 hour segments, and ultimately I gave up 6 months of my life; then when I went back to work, I gave up weekends to ensure that he was happy and settled too.
Saying that I gave up my life does sounds a little dramatic. But we just never ventured too far away from home to avoid disruption to his routine. I really didn’t mind it for as long as little man was happy, that is all that mattered. If he was crying and upset due to having a short nap as I wanted to go out shopping for example, it would make it a long day for everyone.
I didn’t have a child so that they could fit in with my life, I always made it clear that he was to come first at every opportunity.
However, now that he is 2, I have started to become a lot more flexible and go with the flow.
Last week I had to go into work, and I took him with me. I knew he would only have a small nap, yet I was okay with that. I knew he would be fine, and was resided to the fact that it would just be a bit of a longer day.
Someone once said to me that little man was such a good baby, and that we were so lucky.
I will never forget that. Yes we are lucky that he was a good baby, but it wasn’t really down to luck. It was down to good judgment and perseverance.
My family commented last weekend about how different I was. How chilled out and relaxed with parenting I had finally become.
If he wants to go outside and play in the rain, then why can he not? If he wants to nap a little later or refuses to eat his spaghetti hoops, oh well.
People may have had their doubts and reservations about my controlled parenting at the start of my journey of becoming a mother.
But I would not have had it any other way.
There are tons of different ways of parenting children. All parents have the right to do what they feel is best for their child.
What I did worked for us. I am happy that I am now a lot more chilled out and relaxed as he is more of a little boy than a baby.
As long as little man is happy and healthy, then that is all that will ever matter. So no, I don’t believe it was really luck that made him a content baby and toddler – it was bloody hard work, perseverance and exhaustion. But it was definitely worth it.
Did your parenting styles change as your baby grew up in to a toddler, and beyond?
Busy Working Mummy XOXO