Life

Would having another child mean losing my sanity?

There has been conversation in my house recently about if we were to have a brother or sister for little man – and when would be the best time.

I think the discussions about when the best time to have another child is an important one.

I myself would be happy with just the one child. There is an 11 year age gap between myself and my brother so I practically grew up an only child.

uncle jordan

Hubby however, has 2 brothers and they are all relatively close together. They grew up together, all playing sport, and bonding together as siblings do.

Is that why maybe hubby is a lot keener to have another child than I am?

Now this isn’t an imminent part of our life that is about to happen. It is just something we have been talking about recently. We couldn’t have another child until little man was in school anyway. We couldn’t afford 2 lots of childcare fees, and I wouldn’t want to be a stay at home mum.

I think having no parents close by also plays a factor in it. At the moment we have such a solid routine where everything runs smoothly. Yes it is bloody hard work. But we have to work together as there is no one else to rely on should we need a few hours off at the weekend.

I couldn’t begin to imagine having 2 children. My head would genuinely explode.

One of my first posts was about the fact I didn’t think I was very maternal. I am finding it so much easier than I did when little man was a baby. But with two? I am not sure I am capable of having 2 children. Is that shameful to admit?

What if I find it tougher than before? Would having another child mean losing my sanity?

So at the moment, the jury is still out on whether little man will get a sibling to grow up with.

I am interested in hearing your thoughts on how you coped with 2 children, or if you decided on having just the one?

Busy Working Mummy XOXO

Mummascribbles

Best of Worst
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14 thoughts on “Would having another child mean losing my sanity?

  1. Its funny Ive just wrote a very similar post for meetothermums.com It should be up after 24th
    Its a hard decision. I had twins so already have one of each – They get on most of the time but there are times when 2 is damned hard work!! Good luck with your decision! x

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Great post! I am a mum of 2 with an almost 5 year gap. Two is chaotic and there are times when I feel like my head will explode but it is getting easier now they are 8 and 3. They can be so sweet together. We don’t have much family support, its tough but we are still here! Good luck with your decision x #twinklytuesday

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Hi, this is a really interesting post. I really struggled in the first months (partly due to PND) so hubby and I have both been put off having another. A is only 8 months but I can’t see us changing our minds. Think it’s really important to do what’s right for you. Good luck x

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Great and really honest post. There is this assumption that people work one child always want two and that born parents will automatically be in agreement. It’s such an emotive topic and something which is hard for some couples to reach an agreement on. My husband and I aren’t considering anything immediately but even if we were we both have differing feelings on the matter after experiencing parenthood first hand!

    Good luck making your decision. At least you’re not rushing yourself in to it 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Predictive text made a few changes!! Start should have read:

      There is this assumption that people with one child always want two and that both parents will automatically be in agreement…

      Like

  5. Really interesting post and I think its such an individual thing.

    I totally get the whole not having parents around to help out thing, we have that issue and I’ll be honest…it does make it hard! I found going from one to two honestly really easy (There’s a 2 year age gap between my first and second) but then I unexpectedly got pregnant again when my second baby was 6 weeks old, so now I have a 4 month old, a 14 month old and a 3 year old – most of the time it’s fine but every now and then it does get overwhelming, especially with no help. And I worry that my eldest son is missing out on us because we’re so busy with the babies all of the time. #twinklytuesdays

    Liked by 1 person

  6. We have two with a three year gap. It wasn’t planned that way (I had two miscarriages between) but actually three years is perfect as we didn’t have two in nappies at the same time and BB could help #twinklytuesday

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I’m having this debate with my other half, I’m desperate to try for another baba this year while he wants to wait. I think it’s a case of practicality and whether there’s harm in waiting or not. Great post 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I think your right, and how you both grew up does play an important factor. Theres 1 yr between me and my brother and 3 yrs between me and my sister, and we are all super close, and theres only 18months between the husband and his sister, so for us we definitely want to have 2 as we saw that as a huge part of our lives that we enjoyed and wanted to extend to our own children. Having said that, having the 2nd one almost ended upon divorce more than once! It was bloody hard! there are 3 years between the girls, but number 2 just added so much stress and actually finances at the time was a massive part of that too. I worked when they were little, but Im a sahm mum now, and back then I was basically working just to pay childcare. Having said that 2 is amazing! (now!) – you’ll do whats right for you, when the time comes, and you’ll survive, we have to right lol 😉 #bestandworst

    Liked by 1 person

  9. In a word, yes!! Haha! I have five and lost my sanity a lonnnnng time ago, but at the same time it’s amazing!! It is hard, more so as my age gaps are ridiculous as the youngest three are just 12 months apart but my eldest is 12 so I have had the benefit of small and large age gaps and can see benefits to both. I think that you just have to do whats right for you and your family, I also think that as women we just know when we are done. After my fifth I knew that although I will be eternally broody, our family was complete. #bestandworst

    Liked by 1 person

  10. We’ve both always been in agreement that we want at least two children. For us it’s been about being able to afford the 2nd else we’d have had it ages ago. Now number two is on the way and I have those moments in which I’m freaking our about having two children! I guess even when you desperately want another one the reality is a scary thing! Thanks for linking up with #TwinklyTuesday

    Liked by 1 person

  11. It’s funny how your own childhood influences how many children you want, I have one brother and the hubby is one of three, so he want’s four children (yeh I know!) We’ve also had the discussion as to when will be the ‘right’ time for a second baby, I’ve found I’m more anxious the second time round than I was the first, probably because I now know how hard it is and more importantly how expensive childcare is! x #TwinklyTuesday

    Liked by 1 person

  12. I had this dilemma as I was one of three but my hub said our boy didn’t know any different so don’t be worrying about having another. I will say though we have always had a house full of kids, he did seem to bring everyone home to play at ours.

    Liked by 1 person

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