I was travelling back from Cheltenham yesterday and got stuck in traffic (during rush hour). I was in an awful mood trying to get home for bed time.
I hadn’t seen little man on Tuesday as I was working a long event day. It looked like I wasn’t going to see him on Thursday either.
Being in the car for 6 hours in one day gives you opportunity to ponder life and life’s expectations…and the expectation of me at the moment is high.
I get that I work full time and it is my choice to do so. But sometimes I have to say no. Now I rarely do this as I am the one that not only organises the events, but also does some sales and all the marketing. I feel guilty for not being at work sometimes to see events through, and I do not like missing things.
However, I got to the point this week that I said no. I was going to have to work this weekend, only for a few hours, but still work none the less.
It would have had a massive impact on my day. It meant trying to organise times to meet hubby and get little man somewhere in the morning. It wouldn’t fit in with nap times. We would have to miss his swimming lesson. It would make our day extra long and really hard work.
So I am now not working this weekend. With so many big events coming up over the next few months, I had to listen to myself and just try and take a step back.
Suffering from anxiety, sometimes things are harder for me to think about rationally and I get stressed more easily. For the sake of my family I am now spending 3 days off with them as I know we have a huge event next weekend.
I want to spend time with them and enjoy time off being mummy, not the grumpy bitch in the office…which then leads to grumpy bitch mummy and wife.
So I now get a nice bank holiday off – not to relax, which is impossible with a toddler anyway, but to go on adventures and explore new things with my little man.
That for me is exactly what I need at the moment.
What are your plans this weekend?
Busy Working Mummy XOXO